We’re all guilty of being narrow in our thoughts and patterns at times. Discover why open-mindedness can be of benefit along with three places close-mindedness can sneak into our lives.
A couple of months ago I sat down with an intuitive who turned my dating world upside-down. She told me one thing in particular about finding “the one” that I think about on a daily basis. It hit home so strongly that I must share this sage, sweet wisdom. Hint: it involves chocolate
Millions of people are hoping and praying for their soulmate to appear. When the Universe (or whatever higher power you believe in) sends this person your way, it’s ultimately up to you to recognize when he or she has arrived. There’s a strong element of personal responsibility on your part to clear your space and make room for this person. If you don’t, you may miss your chance (yikes!). (more…)
Why is it that so many happily married couples say they met “the one” when they least expected it?
When people actively seek their soul mate they may date around like crazy, sign up for multiple online dating sites and otherwise play the field. With all that work it should seem logical they would have the most success. And in many cases, they do. However, we’ve all heard “I met the one when I wasn’t really looking” enough times to know there is something to this phenomenon.
In Mars and Venus on a Date, John Gray, PhD explains that the people who experience this feel lucky because they weren’t consciously looking. There’s a saying “Luck happens when preparation meets opportunity.” The same concept applies here. (more…)
Last week I experienced the best breakup ever.
Nixon and I had been dating for over a month and I could feel a few things happening. We’d jumped into things pretty quickly. While we started off wanting to just have fun and not get too serious, I could feel my “Venusian” tendencies starting to take over and want more. I had a clear realization: I authentically knew that while I wanted more, I just didn’t want more from him.
Rather than get upset that we weren’t a perfect match, I explored how to approach this mindfully. Here’s what I found out: (more…)
Over the past three months I’ve been on Match, OkCupid and most recently, Tinder.
As the founder of a forthcoming online dating site, I have a two-part interest in using these sites.
Obviously I’m in it for the fun of dating, the potential to meet Mr. Right, and yes, I’ll admit, the free dinners can be nice sometimes. But they also serve as a great research tool. (The sites, not the men!)
No one ever warns us. All the magazines, movies and thousands of articles on dating paint a blissful picture of engaging conversations over cocktails, passionate candlelit make-out sessions, a beautiful couple frolicking through a field during sunset. I’m going to let you in on a secret: all these happy single people are missing one thing. Sleep. (more…)
I have a new hero: Amy Webb. She’s a data-loving CEO of a technology company who, since giving this TED talk, may be forever known as “the woman who hacked online dating”. So how did she do it?
Apparently Webb was having very little luck online dating. The guys she liked didn’t write her back, and her own profile attracted less-than-desirable prospects. So naturally, she turned it into a data experiment and geeked out on spreadsheets. After laying out 72 key data points, creating multiple fake male profiles (you gotta check out the competition!), then collecting enough data to create her own “super profile”, Webb suddenly became the most popular gal on the site. The story ends nicely with Webb meeting her future husband and accomplishing her must-start-having-kids-by-35 timeline. (more…)
When I met my “Unexpected Bonus” last week—let’s call him Nixon—I was just hours into adopting a new mindset of being truly open to whomever comes my way, rather than making snap judgements about if they “fit” into my criteria of who’s right for me or not.
Apparently my friends were more aware that I do this than I was. Over the weekend, I went out to brunch with an ex-boyfriend (we’re still close friends) and he had some interesting feedback. He told me that he’d read about my dating rampage and when he got to the section about my visit to the intuitive—where she called me out for being close-minded about men and too strict about my so-called “criteria”—he thought “bingo!” Apparently he picked up on that right away in the short time we were together over three years ago. Talk about a humbling moment. (more…)
On August 14th, 2013 a girlfriend and I made a commitment to simply date for six months without getting exclusively involved with anyone.
Do the math and you’ll find that the pact ends on February 14th, 2014. How convenient.
Our goal was simple: to date with no expectations. So much of the dating experience is based on self-created stories about where things are going and obsessively mapping out the future which ends up being a huge detriment to the present. Instead of stressing, we wanted to approach the process with ease and simply form as many connections as possible. (more…)
Every few years a film comes around that changes how you look at the world. If it’s powerful enough, it may even change how you treat yourself and others. I AM is one of those films that still has us talking months later. You can find I AM plus hundreds of other inspirational titles on Gaiam TV for FREE!